I've been submitting my poetry manuscript to a lot of poetry publishers and I just keep collecting rejection letters. If you're in the process of submitting your work—whew, solidarity!!  

And I'm trying to practice what I tell my editing clients: to remember that this is part of the process and that I don't have to extrapolate and make it mean something terrible. And that I have choices! I may end up self-publishing, for example.

And I've been needing some stories of fellow pilgrims on this journey.

I went back to Spencer Reece's memoir The Secret Gospel of Mark (such a good book about queerness, addiction and recovery, the contemplative Christian path, and all held together by poetry!). Reece's first poetry book was turned down for fifteen years until it found a publishing home—selected by Louise Glück, no less! I loved reading about his patience and faithfulness to his vision and his slow pace. He calls himself a "slow creator" and talks about how his books are decades in the making. 

I've realized during this process that I'm not in a huge hurry and I don't need to publish my book in order to prove myself or my ideas. I actually already genuinely like myself and genuinely like this book!! This might seem like an obvious starting point for most, but for someone who has struggled with a lot of self-doubt, it really is a big shift and offers me a lot of freedom. 

But I also think it makes me a little less "hungry" to get my book published, and we don't have very many examples of people softly and patiently doing the thing they want to do. It's usually all about being hungry, driven, going "all-out."  

So I'm out here look for more examples of people doing what they long to do, but in a softer way. Do you have any recommendations for me—films, shows, books, music?  I'd really love to hear. 

With care,
Brianna

P.S. Spencer Reece's poem "The Clerk's Tale" about his day job as the assistant manager at Brooks Brothers at the Mall of America

Image by @dcbelanger